I’ve been dating someone for 6 months. My coworker introduced us. He’s super nice and we connect on some things. I think I was in a pretty low place when I met him and now that I’m feeling better I feel like I want to see other people. But he is SOOO nice. I feel guilty even thinking this but should I leave him?
You also seem like a really nice person. Being a nice person with empathy can put you at risk for remaining in relationships that not only don’t serve you, don’t serve the person you’re seeing. That is part of what is going on here. First, you need to call it what it is. This is a pity relationship. And pity relationships always eventually end. You feel guilty about using this guy for emotional support early on. Stop. That was his decision and you have no idea if that is something that drained him or if he was happy to do. He was by the way happy enough because he remained with you. Second, stop fooling yourself into thinking that you’re doing a good thing. You’re keeping this “great guy” from meeting someone who is a really great match. Third, you can’t protect him from being hurt. You will not permanently damage him. Fourth, people change. You felt low and you had different needs that you do now. That’s okay. It doesn’t mean you were trying to use him because your needs honestly did change. Fifth – the coworker. No one in their right mind thinks that introducing two people guarantees it will work out long term. The coworker should be a non-issue. The way I see it you gave this relationship a solid go. If you’re kind and don’t drag it on any longer you have nothing to feel bad about.